The Paradox of the Need to Control

Attempting to controlWe acknowledge some people as influential. Often influential people have a kind of wisdom about the way they move and talk. They tend to be expansive, as if on a mission to create a better world.

We recognize another type of person with a less flattering term: the control freak. For the person with a high need for control, the dominant characteristic is not wisdom, but fear…

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Some Anxiety Problems are Really Alcohol Problems

Guest Article by Dylan M. Kollman, PhD

Research shows that different people drink for different reasons. Alcohol use has many motivations, and isn’t always linked to anxiousness.

Drinking and anxiety, however, are often connected. Alcohol targets a neurotransmitter in the brain called “GABA.” GABA serves in inhibitory function, meaning it slows the firing of our nervous system. When alcohol activates GABA, it causes symptoms like sedation, muscle relaxation, and decreased coordination.

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Don’t Let Anxiety Become Chronic

I’ve been struck by the number of recent clients with anxiety problems.

Anxiety is a cluster of bodily reactions to a cue, either internal or external. Anxiety involves the release of cortisol into the bloodstream, with accompanying symptoms of increased heart rate, tensed muscles, shortness of breath, and most of all, a sense of impending danger.

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Rituals Help Us Deal with Loss

RitualA number of years ago in the early morning I was walking on the beach and stopped to rest on a bench at the end of one of the short streets leading to the beach. As I sat there drinking in the fresh sea air, an older man arrived in a pickup. He got out, approached the bench and asked me if he could sit down. I welcomed him with a gesture.

After three or four minutes of sitting in silence he got up to leave with the words, “My wife died about a year ago and this was her favorite spot. So every morning about this time I come down to say good morning to her.” He climbed into his pickup and left.

I was impressed with the wisdom of this man…

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