Neill Neill, Ph.D.
The first three stress management tips involved in breathing to let go of tension, keeping your body hydrated to avoid the brain fog and going on a presence walk to get yourself functioning in present time.
Today’s tip, Take an Appreciation Break, is again very simple and easy to follow. But its effects can be profound, because they take place at the physical and spiritual levels, as well as the emotional level.
The Appreciation BreakLook at something, think about something or remember something that you really appreciate or are grateful for. Let yourself feel how much you appreciate it. Feel it at the heart level if you can. Stay with it for 15 or 20 seconds. Do it any time and often, but especially when you are experiencing stress.
When I discovered the appreciation break a few years ago, a beautiful public flower bed near our home was in full bloom. Any time I was stressed or felt under pressure, I would just let my mind go to that flower bed. Within seconds my body would relax and a smile would return to my face. It was during a rough time so I did it multiple times a day.
The thought or memory could also be of a person, a pet, a song or a saint. The content doesn’t matter, just as long as it’s something you really appreciate. (I have been appreciating the sun last few days because we are just emerging from months of cloud and rain.)
As you practice this little exercise over time, it takes less and less time to slip into a state of appreciation, so that eventually you can get there almost instantly.
On the physical level the appreciation break is one of the most effective ways of bringing your heart rhythm into coherence. Simply stated, it helps your heart to work more in congruence with the rest of the body. It’s good for you heart and as a consequence it is good for all your body’s systems.
On the spiritual level the exercise shares a great deal with giving a prayer of thanks. Both are from the heart. Both connect you with something outside of yourself, and as such, act as an acknowledgment of your connection to the universe.
Perhaps the appreciation break and the prayer of thanks are the same thing, except that the appreciation break has no explicit religious connotation. Clearly, either is an expression of human spirituality, whether you are conscious of it or not.
The appreciation break is another key to good stress management, this one grounded in positive psychology. It is a basic mental health tool. Getting in the habit of taking frequent appreciation breaks could change your life.
Psychologist Dr. Neill Neill maintains an active practice on Vancouver Island, BC, Canada. He focuses on healthy relationships and life after addictions. He is the author of Living with a Functioning Alcoholic – A Woman’s Survival Guide.
www.neillneill.com
www.ConquerAlcoholism.com
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I have definitely become a functioning alcoholic. I wake up to a cocktail and go to bed with one. I have a great job, an expensive car, and a great social life. I work out, and am even involved with a sports team. I’m not “drunk” all day, but I drink until I’m buzzed. I actually feel like this is me “normal” now. I’ve tried in the past to go without, but when I do I’m visibly shaky and pretty cranky. None of my friends, family, or clients can even tell anymore. I really want to drop it, but the voice in my head keeps telling me I don’t even know where to start. I’ve set more dates than I can count. That line in the movie 28 Days keeps floating around in my head….”Either something would happen…or nothing would happen”, and I’m justifying the next cocktail. I recently got a roommate (who’s sitting out in the living room), and I thought he would figure it out, but he hasn’t. He thinks I only have the 2-3 cocktails before I go to bed. I really feel like I’m on a road I don’t have the power to deviate from, and now it’s starting to physically show. I’m completely lost and have never been this honest about it.
Hello Lorelei,
It’s true you can manage stress with alcohol. Unfortunately, after a while you adapt to it and it takes more and more to make you feel OK…and there’s the risk of addiction.
Before you make a decision to run off to a treatment center, let’s have a short chat. Whatever you decide, don’t let anyone ever tell you you’re powerless or that you have a disease. You have a lot riding on your next decisions.
Give me a call at the number on my contact page.
Positive thinking can be defined as a mental attitude that is incorporated with thoughts, words and images that are associated with growth, expansion and success.