In Love Again?

In Love AgainWhen Is the Right Time to Enter a New Relationship?

As human beings we are social creatures and seem to be hardwired to be in relationships. Previous to about a century ago marriages lasted on average less than nine years, ending with the death of one. The survivor would remarry and stay married until one of them died. Serial monogamy is alive and well today, the only difference being that divorce replaces death in the transition to a new relationship.

Today the typical transition from one marriage to the next follows one of the following sequences…

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New (or Old) Relationship? Watch your language!

ConnectingShortly after meeting, Barb says to Jane, “My husband doesn’t talk to me,” and Jane replies, “Neither does mine.” The two of them have an instant bond.

A man and woman start chatting one day in the coffee room at the place they both work. They quickly discover that they both hate their jobs. Their instant connection blossoms into an intimate relationship.

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Transitions: Ex-spouses, Friendships and Blended Families

MtWashingtonChalet.jpgWhen two people get married for the first time, they seldom anticipate ever being part of a blended family. However, blended families, and how we transition into them, are facts of modern life.
On the first evening of a recent holiday weekend my wife Eileen and I headed off to a cottage on Mount Washington. About the same time three other cars were en route. Our daughter (Eileen’s) and our two grandchildren arrived. Eileen’s ex husband and his wife arrived with their son and Eileen’s and his son. Then their daughter from Ontario and her toddler arrived in the fourth car.

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How to End a Relationship


There are many ways to end a relationship. But many troubled relationships can be turned around, especially if things have not been left simmering for too long. Rebuilding a relationship requires an intention on the part of each party to change. Focusing exclusively on the other is a recipe for failure. Witness: “You make me drink.” “Your drinking is the cause of our problems.”

Sadly, some relationships reach a point of no return. They are beyond being able to rebuild respect, trust, peace and love. Those marriages need to end.

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